WHAT ABOUT HEF?

Yes, what about Hugh Hefner?

80 years old. Suitcases full of money.

Lots of parties. Wears pajamas 24/7. Cackles a lot. That would be Hef.

E! television on Sunday runs a series called, The Girl's Next Door. It's about Hef, his three live-in girl friends and life as they live it in the Playboy Mansion.

Here they are, Hef's girls.

Go figure. 80 years old. Three stone fox girl friends. For me one woman in my life is enough. That's all I can handle. Or is it?

Sunday night. I've just tuned to E! and start to watch The Girl's Next Door.

She: I'm leaving.

Me: Where are you going?

She: I'm going to the bedroom to watch something else. I am not going to watch that stupid TV show. Why do you watch such drivel?

Me: This is history in the making One 80 year old guy. Three lovelies. Has this ever been done before?

She: Whatever. Who cares?

Me: I'd like to find two girl friends just like the Girls Next Door. They could live with us. It would be fun.

She: Over your dead body.

Me: Come on. It would be fun. I'd make it worth your while. Name it and it's yours.

She: Increase my household allowance by 200%. A new black BMW X-5. A trip to Spain next year. I get to recruit the girl friends.

I'm thinking hmmmmm, reasonable but not like her to agree in a New York minute on something like this.

Me: You get to recruit the girl friends?

She: Only way this is going to happen.

What she thinks is beautiful I often look at as a skunked faced excuse for a person. This might, excuse the pun, get ugly. But it's worth a try.

Me. Well, if you must.

She: I'll have both ladies here tomorrow. Get the checkbook out and start writing those checks for the trip, the car and the increase to my household money.

Wow, that was easy . . . and both ladies here tomorrow? The wife must be one hell of a recruiter.

I'm off to ready both spare bedrooms for our new housemates. Oh yes, and I've got to prepare a schedule. This is going to be soooo very cool.

Click, click! (The sound of both heels clicking together)

There will be pictures tomorrow.