Monday, December 31, 2007

DANCE IN 2008 WITH THIS!!!

Spin, twist, boogie, dance the night away. HAPPY NEW YEAR!

HERE'S LOOKING AT 2008!

Last year we brought in the New Year and on January 1st came down with a week long case of the flu. Whatta a way to begin 2007.

I'm hoping for a better beginning to 2008.

First, I wanna biggg kiss!
At midnight, a kiss from this person is not what I would be looking for.

Must be fresh from performing the Nut Cracker's Suite.

Nice crackers, you nut!

Or would it be nice nuts, you cracker?
A kiss from my two favorite girls at midnight would be the frosting on the cake for 2008.

Muuuuummmm wah!
Food TV? Ever watch it.? Their program Everyday Italian is always interesting. HostessGiada de Laurentiis has the best teeth and yes, she's a pretty good cook, too.

But those teeth. . . and the cleavage which is always displayed (why do women do that to men?!) is not too shabby, either.

Last night the wife and I used one of Giada's recipes. Simple. Quick. Deee lish!!






Chicken Spezzatino or Chicken Stew

2 tablespoons olive oil

2 stalks celery, cut into bite-size pieces

1 carrot, peeled, cut into bite-size pieces

1 small onion, chopped

Salt and freshly ground black pepper

1 (14 1/2-ounce) can chopped tomatoes

1 (14-ounce) can low-salt chicken broth

1/2 cup fresh basil leaves, torn into pieces

1 tablespoon tomato paste

1 bay leaf

1/2 teaspoon dried thyme leaves

2 chicken breast with ribs (about 1 1/2 pounds total)

1 (15-ounce) can organic kidney beans, drained (rinsed if not organic)

Serving suggestion: crusty bread

Heat the oil in a heavy 5 1/2-quart saucepan over medium heat. Add the celery, carrot, and onion. Saute the vegetables until the onion is translucent, about 5 minutes. Season with salt and pepper, to taste. Stir in the tomatoes with their juices, chicken broth, basil, tomato paste, bay leaf, and thyme. Add the chicken breasts; press to submerge.

Bring the cooking liquid to a simmer. Reduce the heat to medium-low and simmer gently uncovered until the chicken is almost cooked through, turning the chicken breasts over and stirring the mixture occasionally, about 25 minutes. Using tongs, transfer the chicken breasts to a work surface and cool for 5 minutes. Discard the bay leaf. Add the kidney beans to the pot and simmer until the liquid has reduced into a stew consistency, about 10 minutes.

Discard the skin and bones from the chicken breasts. Shred or cut the chicken into bite- size pieces. Return the chicken meat to the stew. Bring the stew just to a simmer. Season with salt and pepper, to taste.

Ladle the stew into serving bowls and serve with the bread.

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Sunday, December 30, 2007

UNCLE MAX

Son Max spent a bundle traveling from Seoul to California for Christmas. Apart from visiting with friends and relatives Max was especially anxious to see Grace and experience Christmas with her.

Nice picture but poor composition on my part. Must have been one too many cups of holiday cheer. Duh!

Max and Grace are close. They can relate. Christmas day they romped through the house playing hide and go seek. They shot at each other with toy guns. It was fun to watch.

There's hardly a day that goes by that Grace doesn't saddle up to the map of the world and point out Seoul Korea on it. "There's where Uncle Max lives", she says. Not bad for a five year old kid.

Max is most content to live away from his family and be in South Korea. He was recently hired to teach at the University. That was good news. Professor Maxwell has a ring to it. There's another job with a Seoul corporation that he has teaching English as a second language. But Max's real anchor to Korea is the love of his life. Max's main squeeze - Una is a keeper.

Though it's apparent that we've gained another member to our family there's no doubt that we've lost a son to the other side of the world.

We'll just have to cherish Max's visits to America even more than we already do and make the most of them . . . and take time ourselves to jet off to that land far, far away . . .

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Friday, December 28, 2007

CHRISTMAS PART TWO!

Uncle Max brought Grace a fan and a doll from Korea.

Every girl needs a fan so she can do a fan dance.
Here's Grace's mom getting into the fan dance.
And then Grace's dad had to do the fan dance on the butt. Monkey see, monkey do.
Of course the wife couldn't resist and neither could Gracie.

I think we've started a fan club.

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Wednesday, December 26, 2007

CHRISTMAS DAY PART ONE

It was one long puppy of a day but a happy one . . . a memorable Christmas.

The wife is readying the 14 pound prime rib roast for the oven. I am missing an arm and a leg.
Son Max in from Seoul Korea for the holidays is adept at cooking. Here he's making his very own Christmas ham and eggs breakfast.
Ah, Christmas dinner served at about 3 in the afternoon. Here's son-in-law Keith, daughter Dawn and the wife.

Keith said grace.

Then each of us lit a candle in remembrance of a family member no longer with us.

I wanted to remember our 16 year old cat Fluffy, ailing with kidney disease, who had to be put down last month. The wife said that Gracie thinks the cat is with me in Big Valley and believes that Fluffy spends her days chasing ground squirrels. I'd like to think that Fluffy is doing just that.

Anyway, I did not mention Fluffy but lit a candle for my grandmother who cared for me from birth to age 3. That's another story worth telling some other time.

Dinner was prime rib, honey baked ham, baked potato, cranberry relish, green salad, assorted veggies, and cheesecake.

Acid reflux anyone?


I wonder why we always lean in one direction when we eat. Maybe the house isn't level or maybe I was too wasted to take a straight up picture.

Anyway, Max, son Scott, Gracie and the wife leaning one way or the other.

We really have to work on every one's posture or maybe I should just buy a camera with a wider lens.

In the background are Keith's two kids from his training marriage. Good kids - both well over 6' tall and they eat like horses.

Missing from our Christmas is son Todd who is probably permanently pissed off because the family would not loan him the $14,000 he asked for back in October.

It's a long story on why he needed the 14k (was not the first time this boy had asked for a like amount of cash) but let's just say that lending him this sum would have been good money after bad. We're careful with our money which is why there is always money in the bank for that rainy day.

That said, it was an enjoyable and what will turn out to be a memorable Christmas for the other members of our family.

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Monday, December 24, 2007

All About Santa

If you've ever wondered about Santa here's the real story . . .

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

PEACE ON EARTH?

Was there really ever peace on this earth? And what about that "goodwill towards all men" deal?

In my lifetime I can't remember a time when there was peace and that the prevalent attitude of the citizens of the world was goodwill.

What legacy will our children inherit? I honestly believe that answer lies in who is elected as the next President of the United States.

Think about it: the trillions of dollars to "fight" the war in Iraq could have been used for any number of causes all in the name of humanitiarian purposes.

Wow. Think about what a difference in this world all of that money would have made . . . if proper oversight was provided.


Tony Bennett sang a song "If I ruled the World." His song sums up my thinking on this Christmas Eve.

The world would be a much better place only if . . .

Today's pictures: Grace, of course. She's all dolled up for the Nutcracker ballet put on by the Cow Town Toe Hoppers.

Daughter Dawn had a lot of company Saturday. I volunteered to cook her 20 pound turkey in the Weber.

The secret of cooking any turkey is not to let it cook past the point that it is done. See the probe?

Houston? We have ignition! Lift off that turkey in the BBQ!
And there you have it. 20 pounds of turkey cooked at 325 degrees for 4 hours. Perfect-o!

To the other turkey's in this world, get your stuff together and make 2008 a better world to live in. PLEASE!

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Saturday, December 22, 2007

12 Days of Christmas

Well, it's one way of looking at the 12 days of Christmas.....

Pass the beans, please.

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS IN THE VALLEY

It was early morning. On the way to work.

I thought I had a steady hand on the camera.

I thought that I had stopped the truck.

As they say, the proof is in the pudding.

Shaky hand. Moving vehicle.

I'll have to try this again. A lit 18 wheeler is a beautiful thing.

We do things like that in the Valley. If it moves, we put light on it. If it doesn't move we light it up anyway.

Yahooooo!

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Tuesday, December 18, 2007

TMI TUESDAY - WHY ISN'T THIS MULTIPLE CHOICE?

In school I prayed for multiple choice questions. When you have not studied and have no clue the odds of a better score definitely swing toward you on a multiple choice test. And today's questions? Holy Cow! I could use some help here.

1. Are you done with your shopping yet?

Done shopping for what?


2. What is your favorite sexual position?

The Republican position. We screw everybody anyway we can. We learned this from our wonderful leader, George Bush.



3. On a scale of 1-10, how open are you to trying new sexual things?

Trying new sexual things? Can I buy them at Macy's? Or is this on the menu at McDonald's?



4. What present are you hoping to get this year?

Peace in Iraq. Oh, and President Bush? Peace on you, brother!



5. With your current partner (or your last partner) how often was the sex better than just good?

My current partner is my last partner. "Good" is a C on the grading scale. Have you seen Love Story? In this film someone says, (Ali or Ryan) Love is never having to say you're sorry."

When you've been married as long as the wife and I, good, bad or indifferent sex is never having to say you're sorry.

That said, "Wow, baby, you're the best!"

Happy TMI everyone.

Sunday, December 16, 2007

CHRISTMAS AT HOME

The church Grace and her family belong to had an event last night - a dozen outdoor displays that depicted the birth and story of Christ.

Grace's family were assigned to be the happy little unit celebrating Christmas.

I was hoping for the Nativity scene assignment for Grace's family. Her mom would have been the Virgin, the boy friend as Joseph, the two half bro's as Wise Men, the boy friend's daughter as Baby Jesus, and Grace as a sheep herder.

Well, mom's not a virgin, the boy friend is a painter, not a carpenter, the two half bro's are wise asses and not wise men, the boy friend's daughter was not male enough to play Jesus and Grace will be a Vet once out of college and definitely not herding sheep.

Apparently the powers to be in the church saw it that way, too and the little family ended up opening pretend presents all night long much to the delight of passers-by in their automobiles.

Grace and I "caw, caw, caw!" at each other - just like crows. So when the wife pulled up to their "scene" last night I opened the window and started crowing. There was no doubt in any one's mind as to who was in the black BMW SUV - some jackass making lots of stupid noise.

CAW! CAW!

Every family should have some sort of signal.

Quoth the Raven every more.

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Friday, December 14, 2007

Good Lord! Why Am I Stuck on this Song?

Well I don't know why I came here tonight,
I got the feeling that something ain't right,
I'm so scared in case I fall off my chair,
And I'm wondering how I'll get down the stairs,
Clowns to the left of me,
Jokers to the right, here I am,
Stuck in the middle with you.

Yes I'm stuck in the middle with you,
And I'm wondering what it is I should do,
It's so hard to keep this smile from my face,
Losing control, yeah, I'm all over the place,
Clowns to the left of me, Jokers to the right,
Here I am, stuck in the middle with you.

Well you started out with nothing,
And you're proud that you're a self made man,
And your friends, they all come crawlin,
Slap you on the back and say,
Please.... Please.....

Trying to make some sense of it all,
But I can see that it makes no sense at all,
Is it cool to go to sleep on the floor,
'Cause I don't think that I can take anymore
Clowns to the left of me, Jokers to the right,
Here I am, stuck in the middle with you.

Well you started out with nothing,
And you're proud that you're a self made man,
And your friends, they all come crawlin,
Slap you on the back and say,
Please.... Please.....

Well I don't know why I came here tonight,
I got the feeling that something ain't right,
I'm so scared in case I fall off my chair,
And I'm wondering how I'll get down the stairs,
Clowns to the left of me,
Jokers to the right, here I am,
Stuck in the middle with you,
Yes I'm stuck in the middle with you,
Stuck in the middle with you.


Thursday, December 13, 2007

I'M DEPRESSED . . .


Was depressed last night so I called Lifeline.

Got a call center in Pakistan.

I told them I was suicidal.

They got all excited and asked if I could drive a truck.
LOOK FOR THE SILVER LINING

It's been one of those weeks and it is only Thursday.

40 hours of work in 3 days. 40. And it's only Thursday!

Three student suspensions.

1 for Smoking pot.

1 for A lighter and an aerosol can of deodorant in the boys locker room = one hell of a torch.

1 for Out of control, shouting profanities.

Then there's the three night obligations this week that add to an already long day. But I love what I do. It's my passion. My life. What defines Bob.

TGIF never meant so much. I need the weekend to charge the old batteries.

Mom used to sing the song when she was a bit blue, Look for the Silver Lining. Many posts ago I posted the lyrics to the song. I'll do that again. I need that silver lining to get through another day.

My office staff presented me with a T-shirt yesterday. The front of the shirt reads:

BOB

THE MAN

THE MYTH

THE LEGEND

I've only been working with them for 2 and a half months and they think they have Bob pegged. Is this me? Only I know that Bob is mostly a figment of his own imagination and a legend in his own mind.

Whoever I am or whoever/whatever I've turned out to be, I gotta be me. What you see is what you 're gonna get.

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Wednesday, December 12, 2007

B. S. CAB COMPANY

The Valley has one cab. You can call and get a cab any hour of the day or night.

Sound like a lot of B.S.?

It is - the Cow Puncher Valley B.S. Cab.

The wife took this picture last weekend. She could not resist.
Oh give me a home, where the bull shit cabs roam. . . .

What an appropriate name for a cab service in Cow Puncher Valley.
Hanging from the rear view mirrow is this wang-dang-doodle. What do you think it is for?

Maybe it's to protect the B.S. cab from evil cows.

Or evil cow spirits....


I'm thinking the B.S. cab service would make a great movie........

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Tuesday, December 11, 2007

TMI TUESDAY - Ho Ho ho!

1. Are you and early shopper or a late shopper?

Depends on if I have Chet's nuts roasting by an open fire (I have no idea who Chet is, I am not gay and I could care less who's nuts are by the fire. I just wanted to write that).


2. What is your favorite cartoon (current or passed)?

Well, hell yeah, it has to be Tom and Jerry - the numero uno choice of Old Bob and Gracie!


3. On a scale of 1-10, how competent are you on home repair projects?

Do you know who the first carpenter was? It was Eve.

She made Adam's banana stand. .. . (drum roll, please)....


4. What is your favorite holiday tradition?

Coming down the chimney. It's a hard trick but I can still do it.


5. Describe your favorite kiss? Do you give it or receive it?

I gave it. On Bodega Highway late one warm May evening. A kiss I'll never forget. Never.



Bonus (as in optional):What is the best holiday gift you have ever gotten?

I'm difficult to buy gifts for. If I want it. I buy it. Come Christmas there's nothing I want. It's already been had. But I know there's something that was the very best that someone bought for me - probably the wife . . . now, if I can just remember it.

Shimmey down the chimney - fill up my stocking. This song runs through my head as I sit here writing this blog - Alison Krauss sings it. Check it out.


Best holiday gift you've given?

It's been said I give good gift. What was the best? Damn, there goes that memory again.

Monday, December 10, 2007

I USED TO BE A TEACHER

I wasn't half bad looking.

Did I ever wonder about this?

Yup.

And I sure as hell didn't fantasize about any of our kids' teachers.

Not!


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Sunday, December 09, 2007

BINGO!

Saturday night is Lion's Club BINGO! night in the Valley. If you're an old fart, AARP is your name and Bingo is your game.

Because I'm a Lion we went to help work the BINGO. But there was sooo much help already the wife and I ended up playing BINGO!

We're not talking straight on BINGO!. We're talking complicated BINGO!

To win you had to have a certain pattern on your cards. It was not straight this way or that way. You could not have brain farts or brain cramps and play this game.


This is Lion Bob but I like being called Lyin' Bob. It fits with what I do for a living.
I let the wife figure out all that BINGO! crap. She had help from a really nice lady, Georgia, who sat next to us. She wore one of those knitted caps you see "people of age" wear. Nice lady. Stupid hat.

I crapped out about nine and we left at 9:15. When you get up at 4:30 a.m. every morning nine at night is time to pass out. Some date I am.

We'll play BINGO! again one day. It's a piece of American that is slowly being swallowed up by Indian Casinos.

The wife and I will enjoy that piece of life every chance that we get.

BINGO!

By the way, maybe we can practice "She Got Big Back" - our do over wedding dance we're planning, at the next BINGO! meeting. We'll be the talk of the Valley! They'll be peeing in their diapers!

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Saturday, December 08, 2007

Your First Dance A New Spouse: What Did You Do?

I wanna get married again (okay, okay - to the wife)so I can do this!

OUR LITTLE SOCIAL BUTTERFLY

She could be a cruise director.

Or a drill sergeant.

Maybe a film or play director.

How about President of the United States? This five year old could out think, out smart, and out lead Hillary . . .

Grace is a leader, a doer, someone who's always smiling, happy and wanting the best for everyone - and she's everyone's best friend.

There's no stopping our girl.

This was taken Thursday right after the school's Christmas choral event.

It puts a smile on my face.

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Friday, December 07, 2007

SNOW IN THE VALLEY

It's cold. When it's not raining it's snowing. When it's not snowing it's frosty.

The wife's SUV on ice.

Then there's the ever present black ice. It makes driving fun. Kind of like slip sliding away and a challenge to keep four wheels on the pavement.

Did I mention deer? Always a lot. Always a few dead bodies on the road to and from work.

Black ice. Deer. Snow. Then there's the logging trucks full of huge trees, cattle trucks full of bovines and hay trucks plum full of hay.

In the Valley it pays to be a vigilant driver.

Or else . ..

Happy Friday.

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Thursday, December 06, 2007

MY BUTTON DOWN MIND

My Xmas tree in my Valley Pad. Cute. Hark!

Stupid thoughts infliltrate my mind at 2 in the morning.



Is is Salsbury Steak or Sal's Berry Steak?



Does electing Hillary as President mean that we'll have a two family political system that will have lasted from 1989 until 2016? Think about it before you vote.



They say once you go black you never go back. That's why I'm voting for Obama in 2008. It's time for a minority to serve as our Chief Executive Officer.


What the hell is an Electoral College and why does that determine who becomes president? I think the Electoral College is made up of idiotic high school drop outs. How else did George W get elected twice?


If education is our most important product why are incompetent teachers protected by tenure?


White male discrimination is running rampant and it bothers me.


Why is it that women now join what were once were men's clubs but men cannot join women's clubs. If you're male try to join Curves or the Soroptomist's and see what happens.


Why do physician's think they can make you wait 20 or more minutes past an appointment time and think nothing of your inconvenience? I wait 15 minutes and then tell the receptionist that my time is as valuable as the physicians and start to leave. That's when you're seated in an examination room.





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Tuesday, December 04, 2007

TMI TUESDAY #112 - HERE WE GO AGAIN!

1. If your partner buys you a sexy little "something" is it a present for you or for your partner?

I don't have a partner. Never have. Never will. Partner defined in my book refers to same sex relationships and Brother, that just ain't me.


2. What are 3 characteristics of "your type"?

Tits, tits and more tits. Then there's NRA's (nice round asses) and red headed women who I cannot resist.


3. On a scale of 1-10, how good a cook are you?

Probably an 8. Bob's Chili, Christmas Pasta, BBQ turkey, stuffed peppers, soup, BBQ steak & chicken are my strong suits. I'm not afraid of cooking.


4. Tattoos: Love them or hate them. On you? On a partner?

Grace wears tattoos now and again. They come off. I like those. I can take real or make believe tattoos or leave them.


5. Stubble: Good or bad? How often do you shave?

Since I've never experienced stubble on anyone but yours truly I can't tell if it's good or bad. Shaving is a must for work five days a week. My face takes weekends off.


Bonus (as in optional):What are a few of your favorite things (both sexual non-sexual)?

I like everything. Living life on life's terms should be that way.

Monday, December 03, 2007

CRAP FAIR TREASURES

Saturday's visit to the Cow Puncher Valley Crap Fair yielded a two step stool for Grace (to reach the bathroom sink and other places too high for a five year old), a wreath to hang over the family room fireplace, a rubber band gun for Papa's girl, handmade cards and the five scarves pictured here.

The wife loves to photograph things like this . . . textures, colors, all things different.

It's Monday and there's a another tough week staring me in the face. I count the hours, the days, the weeks, the months until this assignment is over and I can return home. What seemed at the time to be a good idea is turning out to be a personal ordeal. I've never spent this much time away from home. The time away is taking it's toll.

So, time to buck up, forget the time that's left and do the job. There's no one else to do it.

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Sunday, December 02, 2007

I DID FLUSH!

Me: The water is brown and stinks like rotten eggs and bleach.

Landlord: Well, we flushed the system after pouring 2 gallons of bleach down the well head. It smelled and looked good to me.

Me: If I were living in a Third World Country the water would probably be okay. But I'm not living there and the U. S. of A. water you're providing me is shit. Can't drink it. Can't bathe in it. Can't cook with it. I can flush with it and even at that it looks like I never even flushed the flush!

Landlord: You gotta hose? Hook it up and let it run for a while.

I did. 30 minutes. That did the trick for a while and then brown water slowly came back into the tap water. I won't even talk about what is inside the hot water heater - AGAIN! That was emptied of dirty water last night. With the brown tap water so flows the hot water as being brown . . . again.

Four days after Last Tango in Well Head the water still is horrible.

If there were other places better than this (not withstanding of the water) I'd leave.

Digs wise, this is as good as it gets in the Valley. Water wise - I can do better.

Maybe if I ignore this problem it will just go away.

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Whiskeytown Lake, Very Northern California, United States