EAT AT BOB'S

You've had the idea at least once to open your own restaurant, haven't you? Sure you have.

What seems like a great thing to do most often is:

1. A money pit with no bottom.

2. Something that consumes all of your time.

3. Regular and seemingly endless encounters with stupid people.

4. Realization that most people eat and act like pigs.

5. Your employees make more $$ than you do.

I still think about opening a restaurant. There would be a sign just like this one.

Bob would have more pictures to post on his blog.
Kids in public places can be a pain in the ass. Why is it that some parents are oblivious to the pee poor behavior of their children and let them run free, run wild?

We were in Hawaii a little over a year ago having a delightful lunch on the terrace of a popular restaurant. A brother and sister kept running into our table and running circles around us. Finally I said to the kids that it was time to stop running around us and that enough is enough and to leave us alone. The older sibling immediately went and told her dad that I told them to "get the fuck away from the table". Well, this dude, well under the influence of many afternoon drinks, was ready to fight right then and there. So I told him: "I didn't say that and as for you, get the fuck away from our table!"

After some chest pounding, huffing and puffing on his part he left the restaurant. What an ass.

I was thinking that putting up with people like that might be typical in this type of business. Who needs that kind of grief anyway?




















There are many speciality restaurants. If you're looking to do that you'll need to find your niche in order to keep and attract customers. Run of the mill, Denny's cuisine, will be the precursor to your going out of business.

Now take this place - full service ladies style place. Ladies not only get their OB-GYN needs met but their nails done and a Chinese lunch to boot!

Does it get any better than that?

So how would one order in a place like this?

Wifey: Ahh, I'll have the pap smear with lots of lube, nail overhaul, easy on the cuticles, General Chow lunch special, light MSG, please.

Waitress: Excuse me sir, would you please scoot aside so that I can open the stirrups on either side of the table?

Wifey: Can I get fries with that?