Friday, April 27, 2007


Is that how we begin life in this world? Nothing down, months to pay. Come on down, do we have a deal for you. With your first breath of life, there's a debt to pay. There are terms attached to the life you're about to live.

How you live life, how you've relegated the terms and conditions of life dealt you at birth, that's the real question.

I say, it's how you live life. It's not about living life on life's terms. The terms are yours to define.

When a loved one passed from this world to the next, you can't help but reflect how you've lived a life. Are you meeting the terms, the conditions of this life? Is there going to be a debt to pay at the very end?

And you ask yourself - Are you laughing enough? Crying enough. Loving more than enough? Are you living a full life or are you existing and letting life flow over the top of you? - Are you wasting your the time? Do you have here in a meaningless job, a meaningless relationship or do you sit for endless hours in front of a television or computer screen both meant for a meaningless existence?

St. Peter is going to put these questions to everyone of us. Be ready. Get to studying.

Sitting on a park bench more than a few times this week, staring at the apex of the Sundial Bridge. I am shaken. I am emotionally raw. A friend's death has left me with more questions than what usually run through my mind. This is why I sit. What better place to sit?

BTW Kelly Lynn: That is our moon in the bottom of the picture. Thought you'd like to know.

I have questions that do not have answers. I Googled the deepest depths of my psyche and came up empty. If you shine light in one ear you can see the same light coming out of the other ear. I'm an airhead and there's no going back.

When St. Peter puts the questions up, I will answer correctly. There's a lot of work to do. There's no turning Old Bob away from the Gate, St. Peter.

The wife has survived 8 surgeries, the last being the most serious and the one having the greatest potential for catastrophe.

Here she is spending 5 hospital bound days in February recovering from a second surgery in two days to repair damage done during the first surgery. It was a close one.

Who values life in this family more than she does? Who knows all of the answers to the questions? She's been to the brink and back. The wife knows all the answers. And she's not giving them out.

Who wakes up smiling in the morning and goes to bed smiling?

Only those who have been close to losing their health or their life wake up smiling. And then there's those who are just plain crazy.
I yearn to be four years old again where the worse things in life equate to the cuts and scrapes on my legs, arms and hand, the grief that's caused by a large amount of sand that seems to always end up in socks and underwear and what's most important to me is that I always have my best friend by my side on the playground.

At age four, life is simple. Life is happy. Life appears to be infinite. All as it should be.
Or living a dog's life . . . is that appealing? Only with the right owner. So simple. Like being a four year old kid.

A bone. Two squares a day. Chase the ball. Have your tummy scratched. Ride in the truck once a day. And enjoy a walk on a sandy beach every few months.

It doesn't get any better than that.

No such luck on either of these counts. No chance being four years old again. Being a dog? Maybe in the next life. I'll let you know how being a dog works out.

My friend Gail will be put to rest Monday. Son Max, just in from Korea is making the rounds of his friends in Huntington Beach, San Luis Obispo, San Diego and Palm Springs. We have planned to meet in Yosemite Monday for hiking, sight seeing and photography. Our trip has been months in the planning. What to do? What to do?!

WWGD? Would would Gail do? A memorial service on Monday or meeting Max in Yosemite? Knowing Gail she would say, "Oh, my gosh, you go for it?"

Gail said "oh, my gosh!" a lot. It went like this: Oh (pause two seconds), my (pause two more seconds) gosh!.

And that's exactly what we're going to do - go for Yosemite. I'm bringing the climbing equipment. There's going to be a major assault on one the mountains around Yosemite.

The service celebrating Gail's time with us: Apple Town; 3:00 p.m.; Monday. At exactly 3:00 p.m. on Monday Max, the wife, the dogs and I will be at an overlook somewhere in the Yosemite Valley. A prayer. A moment of silence. A toast. A celebration of Gail's life.

What better way to spend a Monday at 3:00 p.m.......

We love you, Gail.

And oh, my gosh, WE MISS YOU terribly!

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twilite said...

Hi Bob! Yesterday 26th was ma's 3rd year departure from us to eternity. Personally death has lost its sting. I look forward meeting my parents in heaven one day. I've often asked myself, "What legacy will I leave behind?" Take care Bob n wife. This comes with best life.

Max said...

I'm looking forward to seeing you tomorrow, Dad!

Bob said...

Twilight: Even with the loss of both of our parents, the death of a friend still stings. Thank you for your kind thoughts.

Max: Let the good times roll!

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Whiskeytown Lake, Very Northern California, United States