Deep cover

I'm headed north to go under cover this weekend. I've got a couple of spare bags packed so I should be okay if it rains. Nothing like a soggy bag on your head.

When I'm doing deep cover people often ask who I am and what I'm doing with a bag over my head.

Wifey speaks for me and says that I'm a famous movie star who doesn't want to be recognized. If I said something it would give away my deep cover. So I keep quiet. Wifey usually adds that under the bag is a star who appeared in a lot of movies. That keeps everyone guessing.

Sometimes people think I'm like from a terrorist group checking out places to terrorize. When that happens I pull out a long string of fire crackers, wrap those babies around my neck about four times and in a very loud voice I ask, "Anyone gotta light?"

When I'm in deep cover bartenders usually serve up free drinks just to see if I can down them without getting my bag wet. That's when a long straw comes in handy.

It's soooo cool hitting the bars with a bag on your head because no one can tell when you're over the top stupid drunk. Once while driving home a cop stopped me and wanted to check my eyes out. "Check the peep holes, officer. I'm not getting unbagged for you!"

There's fun to be had up north!