Friday, September 05, 2008

EVIL DWARF ROCKS!

One of our boys has been unemployed for the last month. He's a carpenter. In Cow Town the construction industry is very slow and the prospect of getting work in September is not bright.

At 8 years of age I sold newspapers on the streets of Anchorage Alaska. Why? I was tired of mom and dad pissing and moaning that they didn't have any money. I thought to hell with this. Why wait for the folks to get money. I'll get my own. And I did.

Rarely after age 8 have I ever not been employed.

That's why it is hard to understand why one of our kids always seems to be inbetween jobs. When you stick with one vocation that's what happens especially if it is the construction business.

Me? I'd work at anything if I had to just to put food on the table, a roof over our heads and a six-pak in the refrigerator. And I'd still do that if it was necessary.

Like that sign up there. Women wanted in the bordello. I can cross dress. I can fake doing that up to the point. If I worked in the bordello my customers would only get to first base and no more. Oh no, no more than first base with Old Bob. I probably wouldn't keep that job for long.

If I were unemployed I would try to do a side show act like the Evil Dwarf. I'd get special pants that made me look short if I walked around on my knees. Looking evil comes natural for Old Bob. I could be that Evil Dwarf in a heartbeat.

Like working the bordello, I could be a bearded lady. Put on those chick clothes, don't shave for a month and VOILA! Bobby the Bearded Lady!! TAADAA!
I could do this job, too. Only thing it would be just a little freaky when Mr. Magician brought out the saw and began sawing on the box I was lying in. But I can scream and yell in a way that would make the audience that I was really being cut up. Getting paid for just laying in box would be a great job.
Yeah, then there's this sign. I don't do any of those things like oversleep, get flat tires, leave early for probation and what have you.

Some of the kids these days are pieces of work, aren't they? They feel entitled. That's why Cardo's pizza posted this sign. They want workers not lackeys who think work is a hobby and they can just dabble in getting the job done. You know the kind. We see them everyday at the grocery store or working the mall, at the gas station, the fast food restaurant and so on. These kind of people drive me nuts.

Wifey and I are hopeful that the son finds something soon. He just started to look for a job outside construction which is a good sign.

I'm gonna talk him into applying for that job with the sideshow. He'd make a great bearded lady.

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2 comments:

Deech said...

Bob, I am so with you on this one. I really don't understand how people can say there are no jobs. There are plenty. Maybe its not the job you want to do right now but you take what you can get until you get what you want.

Nice new look to the blog.

twilite said...

Hi Bob. There are few youngster like yourself any more. What a testimony -- getting a job to ensure there is food on table and roof.

I like the new format to your blog.

Have a swell Sunday!

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Whiskeytown Lake, Very Northern California, United States