Run-In With Bad Guys

This morning I dreaded driving the truck to the body shop knowing there would be the question, What happened?

Scratched paint.  Crinkled fender panel.  Something had to have happened.  What do I say? 

Bodyshop Dude:  Wow.  That's a hella scratch.  Lots of damage.  What happened?

Me:  It was horrible.  Last night Wifey and I were driving home from a family celebration and all of a sudden a black SUV pulled alongside.  SUV's window rolls down, driver and a guy in the backseat starts yelling at us.  The backseat guy starts waving a gun.  I have no idea what they're yelling or what they want. 

Body Shop Dude:  YOWWW!  Holy chicken soup with rice!!!  Then what?

Me:  I'm not stopping to ask questions.  We speed up and try to lose them.  I think shots were fired.  Couldn't really tell 'cause Wifey was screaming shit that I can't even remember.

Body Shop Dude:  Were you packing heat? 

Me:  Only Wifey.  About a minute later the guy driving the black SUV slammed it into the side of our truck.  There were like blades that came out of his SUV that looked like they were supposed to slice tires.  But the blades were sitting too high on the SUV and instead made the scratches that you see on the truck.

Body Shop Dude:  Then what?  How'd you get away.

Me:  Well, about the time the blades came out a highway patrol car passes going the other direction.  This freaks out the guys in the SUV who make a sharp right onto another street.  They like fly baby fly down that street.  Funny though the CHP never turned around or came back.  Guess they didn't see anything.  We high tail it home and never see these guys again.

Body Shop Dude:  Wow.  They must have thought you were somebody else.  Man, you're lucky.

Me:  Yeah, lucky.  Now let's see how lucky I really am.  How much is it going to take to repair the damage?

Body Shop Dude:  I think your luck just ran out.