Last week I'm working in the front yard. The neighbor across the street strolls over and wants to talk.
Him: Going to Hawaii Sunday.
Me: Oh really? Which island?
Me: We've been there several times. Love the place. You've got to eat at Kimo's and do a luau. Don't do the Hawaiian luau but look for a place that puts on a French luau. A French luau is so fun and so different.
Him: French luau?
Me: Yup. French.
Him: What's the difference between a French luau and a Hawaiian luau?
Me; Hawaiian luau you eat the pig and sleep with the women.
Me: Get it?
Him: Get what? What's the difference? So if you go Hawaiian you eat the pig and sleep with the women.
I'm thinking that this guy is soooooo dense. So I spell it out for him.
Me: Okay, Hawaiian luau you eat the pig and sleep with the women. French luau you eat the women and sleep with the pig. Get it?
Him: I should have known, Bob. Just watch the house for us and call if anything looks strange. See you in a week.
So much for sharing a little off color humor with the neighbors.
NOTE TO SELF: Stop sharing juvenile humor with over the hill neighbors.