BLESS MY POINTED LITTLE HEAD

On my birthday I had to slick the hair up into a point. It's the hip thing to do these days or so it seems. Anyway, I wanted to make a point that old Bob can still relate to any generation.

Here's my pet vulture relating to Zeenie who's still not sure what the hell this thing is.
Mr. Vulture is trying to make friends but Zeen is having no part of this thing.
To break the ice I dance around the family room with Mr. Vulture and chase Zeen around in the process.

It's my birthday and it's okay to do stupid things like this. The kids just sat back and watched all the while thinking, " There he goes again."

You have to admit, Bob is young at heart.

I gotta do something about my white chicken legs.

BIRTHDAY BOY

It was Bob's birthday Saturday. There were gifts. There were birthday cards. There was out to dinner with the kids. There was a gift box from son Max in Korea.

The day started with a gift from Gracie - a set of drill bits for the new Bosch drill that was a gift on Father's Day. You can see that Gracie's lights are just knocked out over the drill bit gift.

Bob just had to take the ribbon off of the box and wrap it around his head ala` hippie style.
Max's box yielded a bunch of cool stuff including a pet vulture.
Max also sent a hat that I can wear to Temple if I were Jewish. There's a spinner that goes on top that was not yet installed when this was taken. That alone would be a hit at Temple. I should become Jewish just so I can wear this hat, don't you think?

You can see that Flirt is truly impressed with my new bonnet.
Zeenie doesn't know what to make of the vulture. She barks. She chases it around the house.

When I want her attention, Mr. Vulture comes out of his cage and flies around the house.

THIS LOOKS LIKE A JOB FOR OBAMA GIRL!

This illustration provided by The New Yorker magazine, the cover of the July 21, 2008 issue by artist Barry Blitt, shows Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama dressed as a Muslim and his wife as a terrorist.

The magazine says the cover is meant to satirize the use of scare tactics and misinformation in the presidential election to derail Obamas campaign, but Obama's campaign called it "tasteless and offensive."

You make the call.

PHONE CALL FROM BOB'S BOSS TO THE WIFE

http://www.killsometime.com/video/video.asp?ID=993

You've got to hear this.

You've got to.

WHERE HAVE ALL THE BLOGGERS GONE?

What's the life expectancy of any blog that you read? Is it a year? Two years? Six months?

There have been more than a few blogger friends lost to cyberspace since I started this thing two years and nearly 700 posts ago.

Last week we lost Sexy Duet (Mr. and Ms. SD). Yesterday it was Fox. Stock City Girl has been missing since May. There's bunch more who have hung up their blogs for whatever reason.

Then there are those who are just not posting regularly like Blessed, Rachel and a few others.

Ms. SD, Blessed, Rachel and a few others were great blog friends when we lost Jilli. Their words, their prayers were well appreciated and helped to ease the pain of our loss.

Maybe it's that people just get bored with writing and writing and writing without any appreciation from the lurkers or friends who frequent the blog.

Then there's who Fox was married for the second time a couple of weeks ago. I suspect his new relationship is a major reason why he's dropped out. He's professed more than once that he spends a lot of time on the computer. It probably boiled down to, "It's me or the blog."

Out of nowhere this notice appeared on what used to be Fox's blog:

"Blog has been removed:
Sorry, the blog at flyinfox.blogspot.com has been removed."

I would have been nice to have a little notice so we could all have said good-bye.

Sometimes you can tell when a blogger friend is about to hang it up: Their posts become more and more infrequent.

I guess that's the nature of things. Now you see them, now you don't. People move on. As for me, I'll keep blogging. Why?

I blog therefore I am.

Happy weekend, blogger buddies.

YOU'RE NOT GOING TO BELIEVE THIS!

Here's the x-ray of the dime in Gracie's esophagus. She's only five so if the dime looks larger than a quarter to you bear in mind how old this little girl is. She's tiny.

So yesterday we're sitting around waiting for the carpets to dry. They were cleaned earlier and we were limited to the tiled areas in the house (family room/kitchen).

Grace: Grammy, come right now. I think I've pooped the dime out. I think it's out of my body!

Wife after checking the can: Do you know where there's a knife I can use to cut up what's in the can?

Me: You're kidding. You're gonna use a knife we use for cooking to cut up poop? No way. Use one of your gardening knives. Geeze, what next in this family?

Wife gets the knife. Both the wife and Gracie come out to show me they have "gloved up" and are armed for this surgical/scientific procedure. They're smiling. They're happy. I don't get how two people can be so worked up over carving up poop but they are.

I hear happy chatter in the bathroom. After a lot of slicing and dicing of what's in the toilet bowl I hear "WE GOT IT!"

The wife is careful to take the dime and sterilize it. It's discolored for obvious reasons. What used to be a shiny new dime is now a very dull gray.

I decide to place the dime in a necklace setting. If this family is going to be crazy over a pooped dime I might as well join in. A bezel sterling silver plated setting is found and purchased on E-Bay. It's inexpensive but will do the job.

What tales this kid will have when she gets older. She'll never forget her grandmother and how adventurous and fun she was. Cutting up poop with your granddaughter speaks volumes about the wife. She's the daughter of a timber baron and it shows: She can be rough and tumble and has no problem with cutting up poop.

I want to be there when Grace shares her dime necklace with her first grade class. It should really be something to watch the teacher's reaction when she hears this story.

Grace has a problem with telling tales. I usually ask, "Is this a real story or a pretend story?" Nine times out of ten what sounds like a tall tale is.

For the record: This is a real story.

DROPPED THE DIME: DODGED A BULLET

Here's Grace at the hospital yesterday having swallowed a dime she had found at the supermarket. She had put in her mouth for safe keeping.

Some may think that swallowing a dime is no big thing like our honorable son Max (per previous post on this subject).

Here's the deal and why we were concerned: An x-ray at the hospital revealed what we had suspected. The dime was lodged in Grace's esophagus.

So, it was barf the dime up, dislodge from the esophagus and if these efforts failed, a trip to U.C. Med Center for a procedure to remove the dime from her esophagus (extraction or force it down and out of the esophagus).

Grace had to eat lots of pudding, drink lots of stuff until she barfed up. Barf Check: No dime.

A second x-ray showed that while barfining failed on one level that it worked on another. The dime had traveled from the esophagus and into Grace's digestive tract. It is just a matter of time until it's pooped out.

Wanna go on a dime hunt? :)

Here's Grace trying to make light of the situation. Actually, the wife told her to smile for the camera.

I've placed a lot of dimes in a snack bowl. When she asks for a snack today I'll put the bowl of dimes in front of her along with a bottle of ketchup and say, "Chow down, kid. It's all yours!".

Grandfathers have to be like that.

THINGS ARE HEATING UP

Our photographer friend, Robin, e-mailed this picture. It was taken outside of her home last night.

Robin lives 6 miles southwest of where the wife and I live.

The fire remains out of control today. It's been burning since June 21st.

I should mention that the poor guys fighting all these fires (and there's about half a dozen in our area that are out of control and spreading rapidly) are having to sustain hot temperatures. At 1:00 this afternoon it's 107 degrees with a forecast of 117 before the sun sets.

Will this ever end?

DROP A DIME

You've heard the gangsta saying, "I'm gonna drop a dime on that guy."

Here's a new twist on dropping a dime.

Phone rings a few moments ago.

Me: Hello

Wife: I don't want to get you upset but Gracie just swallowed a dime in the grocery store.

Me: Well, that's one way to save money. What did she do that for?

Wife obviously irritated: Because she did....

Me: Oh. Call her mom. The dime has to be barfed up.

Wife: Really?

Me: Really.

I love this kid, our little Gracie. She's like her papa: Learning the hard way becomes a way of life. Bet Gracie never puts money in her mouth again.

Still Relevant Today

Who was it that said that those who fail to learn from the lessons of history are destined to repeat it?

33 years later here we are again.......

WEDNESDAY WEIRDNESS

It's that time of the week. Time to answer the questions as put to us by Amorous Rocker.

BTW: It's four in the morning. What the hell am I doing up?

Before getting to the questions one thing, it's July and the gardening is ripening. Must be all of the smoke in the air from our fires for that stuff is looking pretty good. Check it out.

Okay, today's questions:

Five things you always have in your refrigerator(s) - we have two:

1. Beer
2. Meat for barbecue
3. Bread and Butter pickles
4. Head lettuce for sandwiches
5. Mustard

Five actresses/actors that you think are over-rated:
1. Denise Richards ('cause she won't return the phone calls of blog buddy Fox)
2. Radio Personality Howard Stern - he's sooooo boring!
3. Did Debbie really do Dallas?
4. Leonardo Caprio
5. Keifer Sutherland

Five things around the house that you hate doing:
1. Putting the seat down on the toilet
2. Making the bed/changing the sheets
3. Cleaning the refrigerator
4. Cleaning the dog's butt
5. Washing windows

Five of your favorite movies:
1. Why I Love Bondage and Other Happy Endings - Sex Film Staring Prez Bush
2. I Am One Wild Bush: The Life and Adolescent Times of George Bush
3. Feasting on Bush: Cook Book Film narrated by George Bush
4. The Care and Feeding of Your Bush: Health film by George Bush
5. I Love Looking Stupid: Comedy about a man with a double digit IQ who gets elected President

Five businesses/stores (IE Circuit City, Kohls, Hollister, Bed, Bath and Beyond, Home Depot, etc) you would love to win a $2,000 gift card to:
1. Chi-Chi's Massage Parlor
2. Budweiser Super Store
3. Porn R Us
4. Pick 'Em Up Truck Store
5. Williams Sonoma

And if you believe everything you read here I have some swamp land in Florida I'd like to talk to you about.

Happy Hump Day, people.

Summertime And The Living Is Easy For Sweathogs!

Give this one a chance. Classic music especially the ending starting at 4:10.

Sweathogs love to sweat to the oldies....

SWEAT HOGS

The forecast today calls for temperatures reaching 109 degrees (or 42 Celsius).

Tuesday and Wednesday the prediction is 112 (45 C).

We turn into sweat hogs when the temperatures soar in Cow Town. They say don't sweat it. Hmm. Extra deodorant?

I can't even imagine what it will be like on the fire lines. Those poor guys.

The time to be out of doors is early morning. By 6;45 a.m. today I had already trimmed shrubs and cleaned the decorative fountain in the front of the house.

The early bird get the worms and do not sweat.

BITCHES WITH STITCHES

Yup, a bitch with more than one stitch. That would be our Zeenie (short for Zinnia as in flower of a dog).

Operation Spray the Female was last Monday. You'd never know this pup had major surgery. From day one she was back at it: Ball, ball and more ball - hide the ball under the covers, hide the ball under one of the couches, toss the ball in the air and so on.

Like her predecessor, she's a nut for anything ball. Didn't plan it, it just worked out that way. Life at times can be strange and coincidental.


The kids were over for a barbecue on the 4th. A turkey was lightly smoked (15 minutes) as you see here and then placed to finish cooking on the gas Weber.

The neighbors must have thought that I was nuts: All the smoke in our air and here's Bob adding more smoke.

But then, the neighbors already knew that Bob was nuts so it was no big deal in the neighborhood for me to continue to stay in character.
Aircraft loaded with water continue to fly over our Cow Town dwelling during daylight hours. At sunset they land for the evening. It's too dangerous for them to fly their "missions" at night.

There's no containment in sight for some of the fires burning around us and in central California. The Big Sur fire is of particular concern given the inaccessibility of much of what's burning.

Of equal concern is that it's only July 6th. The fire season is just beginning.

It looks like we're in store for one of those long, hot summers.

FLYING WATER BOMBER

Fire in and around our area as well as throughout California continue to rage out of control.

Smoke is everywhere and into everything. Fireworks were cancelled yesterday all due to dry conditions and consideration for fires already burning: Why create a situation for more fires when the fires that are burning can't be put out?

This monster of an aircraft came on the Cow Town Valley scene this week. It's based in Canada. Built in the 1940's there are but two left flying - this one and another based in Hawaii and owned by the same company.

All other aircraft have to land to replenish their load of water that is dropped on fires. Without stopping this puppy dips into a lake. As it scoots along 3 miles of lake surface at 80 miles an hour its tanks are filled with 7,200 gallons of water. It can load and unload 20 loads of water in a day. No time is lost by landing and waiting to fill its water tanks with pressurized hoses.

Awesome.

I'm proud to be an American - American Soldier Tribute

During the Viet Nam era I was a soldier. A trained killer. All for you. All for America.

Today celebrate the freedoms you have and remember those who helped to preserve them.

WHY WOULDN'T I BE PROUD TO BE AN AMERICAN?

These days there are all kinds of people who loudly proclaim that they're proud to be an American.

Given the option, who would be nuts enough not to be an American? For those who have traveled to foreign countries you know well the difference between here and there: Is there any comparison that comes close?

People get confused with not being proud to be an American and just being pissed off.

Someone once said that it was better to be pissed off than to be pissed on. Frankly, I think Americans are both pissed and they're being pissed on by our government.

I think we've all pretty much had it with what's happening in our country. We voted for the clowns in public office - the ones pulling the strings on the American way of life. If we want change we must vote carefully in the next election.

So what are you going to do about it come that first Tuesday in November: Stay home, watch TV and not vote?

Quit your bitching and go out there and do something about it.

Happy Fourth.


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TREAD MILL MUSIC

I need to get back to using the tread mill that's sitting idle in our garage. Before the assignment in Big Valley I'd hit that machine most every morning: At least 4.3 MPH for five miles. That habit was broken last October with my exit to another world 100 miles to the East of Cow Town.

Using the treadmill for an hour means keeping ones mind occupied. Music. TV. I tried reading at 4.3 MPH but Bob is one of those people who can't chew gum and walk at the same time.

In the interest of getting back on the old mill, I'm making a couple of CD's to play while life spins by at 4 miles an hour. Here's one. It's got the beat, snap and lyrics. Check it out.

THE BIG COUNTRY

Are ya a hankering for a good western come this Fourth of July holiday? Check out The Big Country. Good acting. Outstanding cast of stars. It has a plot, too.

A scene from The Big Country posted here is about the Major (head honcho) who wants to ride into Burl Ives' ranch and kick butt. His cowpokes are tired and don't want to have their butt kicked or be killed.

The music helps to make this film a good one. Here's an example.

I CAN SPIT BULLETS!

Have you had a colonoscopy? You've been sedated, right?

Meet the guy who has had two colonoscopy's cold turkey. Yup. Nothing. No drugs. No nothing. True story.

Why? Well, I wanted to stay awake and see if that anal thing was something I wanted to pursue in this life.

I am personally acquainted with the physician doing the procedure. Knowing me as he does, this doc understands what it means to be Bob. Being Bob is an attitude of "Shit? Why not?!" when it comes to all things stupid.

The procedures without medication are all pretty easy until the scope hits a major bend in the road.

Top right of the diagram IS the first bend which always gets from me a:

WHOA NELLIE! HOLY MACARONI AND CHEESE, TAKE IT EASY, SLOW DOWN, WILL YOU?!

WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE, JOHN HOLMES?!!!! SCOPE IT, DON'T REAM IT!

Damn, that's a sharp turn. About that time I always start to sweat.

The last major turn and you know that you're in the stretch. By the second turn I'm really sweating and ready to swear off all things anal. Usually the doc must goes around the corner with the scope and just peers down the alley. He does not go further.

At the commence of this procedure I joke with the doc. I ask if if he wouldn't mind putting a piece of chewing gum on the end of the scope. He always asks, "And why would I want to do that, Bob?" Big emphasis on the word Bob.

Me: When I start chewing then you know that you've gone far enough.

I'm due for scope number three. It's been five years. I can hardly wait to chew gum once more.

Betcha don't know anyone as stupid as Bob.